Decide 2 Matter

Pay the Bills While Building the Dream

When you hear the phrase "follow your dreams", does it make you think that you have to quit your job and drop everything? I think it's a very common after thought. Barbara Sher has said that if you quit your job to become a painter, you'd go nuts. You could never just drop everything and paint all day, or sing all day, or be with animals all day.

Start slowly with whatever it is you are doing. One of the worst dream killers is taking something you love and expecting it to make you a living immediately. Aside from winning the lottery, the "overnight success" is actually the result of many years of hard work. Even one hit wonders have to practice in their garage before someone hears their song.

Eric Maisel, who trains us creativity coaches, has said that artists and musicians need plenty of practice. While the dream to become a dancer is glowing within you, you will get no where unless you dance and dance and dance. Have you really been practicing and practicing all these years? If so, good for you! If not, then get going. When you start slowly with practice, you will get experience and exposure in your field of interest. Also, you will know if dancing, for example, is truly for you. You may only like to watch dancers and may learn that promoting ballet may be your true calling.

For now keep paying the bills with your current job. If, however, your job is toxic, look first to getting a new job that will keep food on the table. You need to take care of yourself financially before you can venture down a new path. And when you venture, do it slowly. Pay the bills while building the dream.

Take a risk

Many of us dream of fantastic lives filled with adventure, passion, creativity, and fun. However, we also long for security, reassurances, and guarantees. If your need for security is great, you may never find that adventure you desire because your worrying will kill it before it even starts.

To experience all that life has to offer, you need to take a risk. When people hear the word risk they usually think of those folks who quit their jobs and moved to Alaska, Hollywood, or Africa. Those are big changes that only some of us are willing to make. But taking a risk can be as simple as not wearing makeup anymore, taking that art class, putting out a personal ad, or starting college again.

When we take risks, we open ourselves up to the many possibilities in store for us. If we over think each scenario in attempt to unearth all possible problems and outcomes, we really limit ourselves. How? Because the information we image to be current is usually very old. Your mind uses past experiences to help you evaluate you current choices. But what if you want to take a dance class and you know nothing about dance? You can't evaluate the experience of dance until you've tried it. And there's the risk. You have no idea is dance is something you like, and you will never know if you sit how thinking about it.

Write down one activity you always wished to try, but would never dare attempt. Write down what you think you know about it. Then, take the risk anyway and see if your worries and thoughts even hit the mark. Have fun, enjoy life, and try something new.

Everyday

What kind of life do you want? Do you want to make a change? If so, whatever you wish to do, you must do every day.

Do you want health?
Do you want fitness?
Do you want love?
Do you want more friends?
Do you want abundance?

Often times, when we want to lose weight, make new friends, eliminate road rage, or save money, we do our best for a week. Or perhaps we are so good we keep up with our new change for an entire month. Is it time for a celebration? Of course! But don't forget, you must keep it up every day.

For the changes in your life to manifest and take root, you need to make small consistent steps daily. These steps don't have to be overwhelming, but you can't be healthy after working out for just a month. Health is achieved over a lifetime in small every day actions. If you want to be a good Christian, or good Wiccan, or good Taoist, you don't just go to church once, do one ritual to the Goddess, or meditate one moment . You must practice your spiritual philosophy - you must live it - each and every day.

Do you feel overwhelmed thinking that you have to do something every day? You only live one day at a time, so it's not as hard as you think. Just be prepared to make positive forward steps each and every day. Before you know it, you'll get caught up in the positive momentum you've created for yourself.

What small steps can you make each and every day to move your life in the direction you want?

Go the Distance

Starting any project brings energy and excitement. We get ourselves worked up. We tell our loved ones what we are planning on doing. We imagine ourselves being who we wish to be. But when it comes time to get started on that dream, that journey, the reality of it all comes crashing down.

Going the distance takes work! Imagine that?

What is it you are after? Are you prepared to go the distance it takes to get where you going? Often times we focus so much on where/who we want to be in life that we forget about the distance it takes (emotional, spiritual, physical, and mental) to get there.

Do you want to lose weight? Are you prepared to exercise 5 times a week or more? Are you prepared to change your diet? Give up sweets? Walk the dog more?
Do you want romance in your life? Are you prepared to learn more about yourself? Release old baggage and old beliefs? Make attempts to meet new people?
Do you want a better career? Are you prepared to work for it? Get that advanced degree? Study on your spare time? Turn off the TV?

Each thing you want to do has many small steps. Moreover, each dream takes many hours to turn into a reality. Sometimes it's fun to daydream of where or who we'd like to be. There's nothing wrong with that. In fact we should all daydream more often! But in order to get from here to there, you must go the distance.

Right now I'm taking piano lessons. When I was a child, I took lessons from age 8 to age 15.  It's been years since I had professional lessons, and it's quite daunting. Could I imagine myself playing complicated pieces? Could I visualize an audience enjoying the songs I've composed myself? Sure! Was I thrilled with the idea of being a pianist?

When the reality came crashing down that to realize my vision I had to practice at least an hour a day, maybe four or five hours if I wanted to be really good, the huge dream of being a pianist started  fading in the wind.

Am I still going to practice every day and do my best? Yes. But now I realize that being a pianist means daily practicing. Am I willing to dedicate four to five hours a night practicing? No. I love so many things that it's important for me to make time for them all. I am aware of the distance and of how much I can travel and better yet where I want to end up.

Are you prepared to go the distance for yourself, for your dreams?

The Loudspeaker

While listening to Debbie Ford at Hayhouseradio.com, she briefly asked listeners if there were things they said to themselves in the mirror, messages that are said to the self through a loudspeaker. I just want to expand on that. If everything we ever said out loud or to ourselves would be said over a loudspeaker, what would we talk about?

If you could put your deepest thoughts and desires on a billboard, what would you say? Do you want "I can't do this." or "I'm not an artist" on a billboard above your house? Do you want "too fat" or "not handsome enough" put on a button you wear all the time?

Think about what you say to yourself. If those negative thoughts were said loudly, I think we'd all realize how much they impact ourselves and those around us.

So, instead, let the positive shine through. Look in the mirror and say, "I love you. You rock." I did that one day. Honest! I really did that. It felt so silly at first, but now when I look in the mirror I think "hey good lookin'!"

Or, I dare you to yell in your house or in your car "I'm awesome! I rock!" or whatever positive exclamation that works for you. Change what is said on that external and internal loudspeaker.

The Job Loop

Are you stuck in the Job Loop? The Job Loop is a mind set that keeps you stuck doing things only if they further your career or get you more money. Yes, we all need to pay the bills, but if you are ever going to start doing what you enjoy, you need to forget about making a living.

Obviously if you are not employed, you have other things to worry about. But, if you have skills and can hold down a job, then focus on the fun!!! Get out of the Job Loop.

When you decide2matter, you will likely want to make a career change. There are tons of surveys out there that claim around 98% of us aren't happy at our jobs. How sad is that? So, of course we dream of doing something different. You would love to be that 2% living your dreams. However, most of those dreams stop short because we worry about making money doing what we love. Yet if you constrict yourself to only what you *think* will succeed and make money, you are severely limiting yourself all together.

You have no idea what is in store for you. You cannot even imagine ALL of the wonderful opportunities that will come you way. And most importantly you will never discover new avenues if you put away a dream because it won't "pay the bills".

Are you stuck in The Job Loop? Do you only look into things that will further your career? When was the last time you did something just for the fun of it? Are you married to your job? your career?

If so, you may be stuck in the Job Loop. I'll write tomorrow about ways to escape The Job Loop.

Take a Vacation!

That's what I'll be doing!

I'll be on vacation from August 27th until September 8th. Of course I won't be returning to work until September 12th.

Woohoo!

Treat yourself! You deserve a vacation.

And more importantly, don't have a boring draining job that is only in your life because you have a lot of vacation days to use up. If all you do is live for your vacations, then your life needs some spicing up.

Take a vacation. Do it right now. Take a vacation from:

• stress
• obsessive thinking
• worrying
• complaining
• judging
• watching the news
• comparing yourself to others
• being hard on yourself
• negative self-talk
• old patterns

I'll be back refreshed and relaxed in two weeks. Hope to hear from you then.

Find Your People

Whatever your interests are, there are other groups of people who like the same thing as you. It's important for you to find your people. Sharing your dreams, concerns, and passions with folks who don't really understand or care as deeply about them can easily derail you. Better yet, find someone who is living your passion and use them as a role model. Barbara Sher said that isolation is the dream killer. So, get out there and join a club, go online, or take a class.

The more you are surrounded by "your people", the faster you will grow in friends, talent, and dedication. Plus when you have those rough days, you'll have someone to turn to who knows what you are talking about.

Finding your people is very easy these days with the internet. Here are some online communities or classes I know about.

For artists: www.deviantart.com Join, post your work, get feedback, get a following, make some friends.

For musicians: www.berkleemusic.com Take a class, send your MP3s to be released on the college broadband radio, join the community.

For writers: www.writersvillage.com Take a class, get support, make friends.

For personal growth: www.zaadz.com Make some friends & talk about life, love, attitude, spirituality, community, and philosophy.

Overall support: www.barbarasher.com Go to her forum (board). Help support others. Make friends. Get support yourself.

Or, if you'd prefer something in person, go to your local library. If there isn't a book club there, start one. Or start a creativity support group. Most libraries will let you use one of their rooms for weekly meetings if the meeting is free.

Whatever you do, don't hesitate and find your people!

Be Open to New Possibilities

How much of your life do you have scripted in your head? Are you constantly expecting the worst from the world, or at least the same old thing each and every day? How often do you let go of expectations and just be open to new possibilities?

Consider This

Everything around you was first an idea;- the chair you sit in, the computer you are reading this on, the food you eat. Everything was once just a concept. And in order for any of these concepts to be fleshed out, the owner of these ideas had to be open to something new.

The possibilities are endless. In order to live a life of meaning, you need to open your imagination and dream of what could be. Or even if you have trouble imagining anything better right now, at least be open to the possibilities.

Exercise for today

Write down on a piece of paper "I am open to new possibilities".
Tape that piece of paper somewhere you will see it.
Be open and have fun. Let go!

Life is a wonderful journey - be open to the possibility that there is something magical in store for you.

Have More Fun!

What do you like to do for fun? Did you know that you were allowed to have fun? Just because you are all grown up, doesn't mean you can't have fun anymore.

Adults take things way too seriously. If you have children, watch how easily they let themselves have fun. We adults often have to schedule fun into our days, but children are amused with the simplest of things. A butterfly, a leaf, a small plastic toy - all of these things are gateways into the imagination.

Your imagination is the doorway into the land of fun. If you are resistant to the idea of fun, think of this. Without breaks for fun and imagination, you're ideas will become old, slow, and dull. You need to recharge your mind with new ideas, new experiences, and light playfulness. What are you waiting for?

To unwind and have fun, I enjoy reading fantasy books. There's nothing like reading about wizards, dragons, and damsels that need rescuing (however cliche) to help me forget about traffic, paying bills, and working on my career. Sometimes if there's a problem I'm stuck on, the answer will seemingly pop out of no where after I've given myself a break for fun.

When was the last time you indulged yourself in something fun? We all deserve a little fun. Life isn't supposed to be serious all the time! Give your mind a rest and let your imagination get a work out. Do something fun today.